This is now my THIRD ATTEMPT to write. I wrote a lengthy full of bitching post last night and when I hit POST, my computer said I was disconnected to the net and so the post was lost. I felt like it was probably for the best and would post today hoping that today would be a better day and I could post something more insightful rather than bitching. I just now wrote 2 paragraphs and I hit some kind of keys and I erased all of what I typed except the first 2 words!!!! WTH!!!!!!
My pit big boy just sat on top of me and closed the laptop with his butt!!!! uuuurrrgh, glad to see i didn’t lose another post though.
You guys, I am really struggling over here. Where the hell is my pink cloud?! My life is really really tough. Being a caregiver AND a parent AT THE SAME TIME is not easy shit! I am really frustrated and it doesn’t help that the wheelchair company keeps fucking up leaving us wheelchair-less and my moody son at home with me leaving us both stuck. I don’t know how long I can keep up being his arms and legs as well as trying to be my own? I get respite care 3 hours a day 4 days a week. Even then, sometimes that is not enough. Seems like everything that can go wrong, is.
Beloved and I are fighting, my lil-bitch pup is driving me nuts! She is being extremely bad, I gotta get her to obedience school ASAP. Lately I just don’t have the energy to train her. I am consumed by sobriety and my son. Alcohol, believe it or not, gave me energy. I would go for hours cleaning house, walking dogs, taking care of V (13 yr old son with DMD) and the rest of the household, cooking and all until I pass out at 10 ish to 11. Now I am tired, can’t get off my butt to do chores nor cook because I am obsessed with my sobriety books, blogs, shows and I am so fucking tired, physically tired!!!!! What’s going on here?
I better post this before I lose it again. Hope someone out there “heard” me and can offer some words of encouragement.