Day 21. Time for real change

I am a little scared that I may be getting a little ahead of myself. I am afraid that the goals and the motivations I am setting forth on this day will be taken away due to stress, worry, grief, pain and sadness due to upcoming circumstances.

The fact is, I don’t feel really like I am recovering when I still abuse my body with junk foods, refined sugars and feeling overweight. I am 5’3 and 150lbs!  All this really alters my moods, affects my self esteem, contributes to my depression and robs me from my energies. I need all of the above to be restored so that I can go through V’s risky surgery and the long recovery process afterwards.

I had signed up for a half marathon in January with Run For Our Sons organization to raise money and awareness for Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy and so the training HAS to start tomorrow and somehow make it a priority during V’s recovery.

Hey at least I can try, right? From here till V’s surgery date of December 2nd, I may be able to detox all the toxins from junk food, increase my energy, and alter my moods to more positive optimistic views and will more easily handle the stress.  I have nothing to lose in trying. I will do all that I can and promise to listen to my body. When it needs rest, I will rest and if I can’t make it to the race, then it’s okay too.

Here is what I worked on tonight to help me get motivated and started. A workout calendar and a little note by my bathroom mirror to remind me of my CAN’s.

I am hoping I can do most if not all of these work outs.
I am hoping I can do most if not all of these work outs.


7 Replies to “Day 21. Time for real change”

  1. Don’t put so much Pressure on yourself!! You have a lot on your plate!! while its good to make goals, don’t set yourself up for disappointment. Yes you can do it!! But give your self time😊😊 you got this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I just feel like shit! I want to return to what I know helps me feel healthier. I lost it all while drinking. I hear you though. I will take it one day at a time and keep you all posted. You are my accountability n I need you


      1. I hear ya, I used to run too, o look at picks of me during my “heyday”, so fit!! I know I will never be where I was, but I want to return to running, but the last 10 months has been sobriety first and foremost, now that I am not fighting the constant obsessions and cravings, I will hopefully get back into running, of course one day at a time😊

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Hmmm, I would consider your sobriety responsibility number 1. I am a slacker but to me it looks like you take way too much upon yourself. I’d like to advise you to cut out everything that will put extra pressure on you. Yeah, haha :-(, everything apart from difficult surgeries…. 😦 .

    And down here I’ve put some stuff on sugar, ranting about sugar is one of my sober hobby’s. :-/ Still:

    Alcohol used to supply your brain with loads of easily accessable sugars, now you cut that you your body goes berserk over sugars. Sugar is another addiction, it is 8 times as addictive as cocaine…. No, not saying you should switch to cocaine ;-D. So that’s where the cravings for sweets come from, sugar addiction 😦 Cutting sugar out is a good idea, taking that slowly but steadily is an even better idea. A lot of people become dissapointed with sobriety because they are not loosing weight because the either eat normal, or eat more sugar to ‘treat’ themselfs. For those where weight is important this is a nasty trap. 😦

    Secondly: 80% of weight control has to do with the intake, only 20% with excercise. Excercising while your body is not in good shape or while you sleep bad can actually stress a body and cause weight gain. (See e.g. Eric Berg on YouTube) Focussing on slowly losing the sugar and artificial sugars will 1 stabelize bloodsugar and when done well (eat enough and something healthy every 2 waking hours) will prevent low bloodsugar that causes cravings that are easily filled in with alcohol. 2 Slowly stabelize cravings for food as well. 3 Improve the functioning of your liver. I’d say give yourself another gift and take it from there. 🙂

    I say slowly because taking sugar out of your diet in one go is difficult. You want to prevent situations where you have a big sugar low while driving for instance. And no, I’m not a doctor, just experience speaking. 🙂

    Hope it helps.
    Hugs, Feeling

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow, you are an all or nothing gal aren’t you? I recognise the tendency in myself but definitely think I’m improving on the “Rome wasn’t built in a day syndrome”. I think people have shared some really good advice here, slowly does it. Take care xx


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